Once again, I had a chance to get a hand on my web journal! Feels so good to be revived!

 ...after a short time in the church, looking back in time reveals an everlasting experience...

      It was just yesterday when I started watching Bro. Eli Soriano's preaching in tv. It was the time I was thirsty for the wisdom of God. I often sigh, and look into an endless space as I lay in my bed every night, saying: "..is this for real? are there really people who really fear God and despises wrong doings?". Maybe, one of the stupidest questions that went into my mind. Actually, it was my dream since I was small. Maybe because I grew up with a thought in  my mind that everyone outside our house are cruel, and will do nothing but bad things against me. In short, I fear people... I don't like being with people, especially, bullies. I always hide myself, I don't want others to know me, they might tease me! And with all of these things of paranoia haunting me until my teenage years, I looks like to GOOD to be true to be in a group of people who are for real, A CITY OF TRUTH that is. I know I believe in God, but I don't know Him then. My hopes of knowing Him  nearly vanished because of many preachers who are nothing but icons of hypocrisy. But still, some how,  by the time God peep down upon the earth searching for His people, He saw me and pittied me.

   I still remember the night I prayed to God to lead me in his path, relieve me from my sins and show me the truth. It didn't failed. I knew it when I found my self walking upstair of our locale and staring at the church logo in front, with a thought inside my mind..."this is my home". All came instantly, and without the consent of anybody, I was baptized. The most wonderful day in my life. Until now, when I recall that day, I fell the tears wanting to pour out of my eyes. It was the first time in my life to feel so light and free, and also the first time to see Bro. Eli in person. He talked to us then, from his hard work. I was astonished to look at him, how he really care for us, even though he doesn't know us nor a little part of his life. But some how, I see in his eyes the true love, the love from God, the love of a the brother in faith...

  It was from then I felt the realization of my dreams, to be with people who are really people. It was too good to be true, and I can't help myself thanking God always, for choosing me to be in his House. But even though I have felt the sweetest and the most memorable experience in life in the church, I also felt the most bitter struggle in my life. A struggle within, that could have swept me away from His hands. I tried to fight, I tried to battle with my own might... But I was wrong, it only weared me out and put me in a weak state feeling... I was about to give up. But then I realized, God is merciful, He would never leave me, if I cannot make it through, He knows how hard I tried, if He really loves me, He will save me... he will save me...

  It was then, I learned to lean on God's mercy, not on my own strength and mind. Until now, I can feel Him talking to me, through His wisdom and through His preacher. I believe I can do nothing without Him. I believe He saves on the perfect time. Actually, I was also one of the many brethren who experienced a vehicular accident, who lived to tell. There is not much space in this page to tell all the good things God has gave me, but I think I can put it all in short phrase, a phrase that says it all......."THANK YOU LORD" 

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